Hopefully moving on....

DIdn't do very well in my dance composition class today... won't want to watch the recording... *tsk*

We are now doing duets... and though my partner is a very nice girl... I think that together we are not adventurous at all... it just feels like a blockage whenever we have to choreograph.. and today we both blanked out during performance... I really don't like this feeling... cos I know I can do so much better...

I'm not saying it's her fault.. it really is not... it's just that we both over-think the assignment and it's not like free moving brainstorming... it's like we both stand there like sticks... just waiting and thinking...

I am so mad with myself cos I know that if I am technically better then I should inspire her to move and not limit myself... which is exactly what I am doing... I thought about it and asked myself why was my choreography this time so ugly and amateur... I think I should have more faith in my partner too and not put boundaries around her abilities... maybe she is able to move much more than she is doing right now... and I probably subconsciously just "simplified" the moves... *sigh* I hope not to repeat the same mistake again... But it's hard... I'm the way I am sometimes... maybe think I'm being accommodating or something... which actually it's a really nasty thought to have...

On the other hand, she is a choreographer too and I don't want to just take over and ask her to do this and do that.. when we should both be able to contribute to a piece...

Even though I get along really well with her, I think that at this time we are not the best combination for this class... we both become too self-conscious around each other... that is just not helping...

The teacher obviously was disappointed... and while there's little I can do about it.. the sucky feeling is still here...